BATFINK MEETS HIS NEMESIS

Well, last Wednesday, 7th Jan, had gone ok as days go.
Work was a breeze, the weather was good, everything was in it's place.

I had a smoke as I strapped the bag onto the back of the bike and chatted to one of the other blokes who rides a schmick XJR1300.
"What pipe have you got on this? It sounds meaty"
I explained that it was the stock GSX-F pipe but had been gutted.
"Nice" he nodded slowly.

I grinned, fired up the bike and left the car park noisier than was necessary. Just because.

3.40 in the afternoon and Stud Road was just starting to thicken up.
This is the stuff I love.
Cars crawling along mindlessly 30k's below the limit and spaced perfectly to squeeze a bike through.

I'd be home in 20 minutes if this keeps up.

On the run down to the Wellington Road lights I was in the right lane behind a brake jockey. On, off, on, off, on, off. Fachrissakes!! Make up your bloody mind!

I got a gap to the left and switched to the middle lane right at the intersection. This is not a move I would normally make as cars get a little skittery when they don't have lots of white lines to steer them straight.

It was all good.
Green light, 4WD ahead of me right on the line.

I don't know why I did it, I really don't.
I shot a glance to the twonk that had been doing the brake light disco. Stupid move.
I looked forward again and the 4WD had stopped dead on the amber light.

Aaah fuck! I hit everything I had that would slow me down and started to lean away in an attempt to steer past her and split the lane.

This had an interesting effect.
The front scrubbed and the back slid and came around.
I remember thinking "I'm not going to make this" and bracing.

After that, several weird things happened.
Firstly was me thinking just how gently I seemed to be rolling off the side of the bike and into the car.
Secondly was me thinking "I'll be able to get a new bike"

Then I was on the ground, rolling, wondering where the bike was, and wincing at the forthcoming crunch as my head was about to hit the deck.
The impact on the lid was so gentle that it shocked me.
"This is all good", I thought, "Wait. No it's not. I'm laying down on the fucking road"

I jumped to my feet, held my gloves out and waited for the ref to hold up his fingers for me to count. No ref, no ring. I did have gloves though.

I did a quick check to see where the pain was coming from. All sections reported clear and operational.

That's when I saw the bike.
Nothing looks more wrong than a bike on it's side with a small trickle of it's life blood snaking out from underneath.
Ever hit a dog and looked at it laying there quivering in pain? That feeling hit my gut like a hammer blow.

The girl from the 4WD was suddenly beside me asking if I was ok and a bloke in socks (no, I don't know why) appeared as well. We lifted the bike and got it onto the median strip. It didn't look too bad.

The girl drove around the corner and into the pub car park, appropriate, no?
I took the easy way and went across the pedestrian crossing.

As soon as I grabbed the clutch, Left Hand Operations sent me a Damage Report marked "Urgent". Jeeeeez!! That hurt.
OK, so something may be rotten in the State of Leigh. We'll check that later.

By the time I had peeled off the gear, the girl had written out her details.
I got her to write mine too because if I tried it would have looked like a 4yo with St. Vitus' Dance had tried with his wrong hand.
Curiousity #5 : Her shirt had "Impact" embroidered on it.

Turns out she is a rider as well and had seen me a few hundred metres back.
Now for the "what if" section of tonight's program.

She said that she had one of those will I? won't I? moments as the lights changed.
That intersection is infamous for it's red light camera.
So she hit the picks. Hard. Without looking in the mirrors. I can recommend the brakes on a Honda CRV. They be good.

So, because of her fear of a red light fine, she has gone against the basic Amber Light Rule : Stop, if it safe to do so.
It wasn't really. The rest of the traffic was coming along as well as me.

If the camera wasn't there she would have run the amber and all would have continued on their merry way.

The other option is that I could have been in the company vehicle. 42,000 kilos of semi is going to make a different bang than 300 kilos of bike and me.


But I digress. That is all theoretical jiggery-boo.
The facts are that I broke my focus and I hit her.
Simple really.Stupid and simple.

So as we stand, the bike is at OCD Racing for it's assessment, the hand is not broken but has a lot of tendon and soft tissue damage and I am bikeless and shitty.

Still, I walked away with no more than a sore hand.
The helmet is unmarked.
The jacket I bought from Frog did it's job, it's a little scuffed but the armour worked a treat. All the stitching has held.


Just a quick sidenote : Those who know about this have given me some stick about joining Netriders and learning how to crash in good company.
When the bloke came to pick up the bike he gave me his card.
It's a Netriders card.
On it is a little line that says "Looking for people to ride with?"
Odd thing to give a bloke as he watches his beloved get carted off.
So I guess, no, I'm not actually looking for someone to ride with.
Thank you, twonks.

UPDATE : The repair quote came in at $5500. A case of the parts being greater than the sum.
So by the time you read this, the bike is sitting at Fowle's Auctions and I am starting to haggle with QBE Insurance about what market value actually means.